


5 Time Trillian Turned Down a Marriage Proposal from Zaphod Beeblebrox (and One Time She Said Yes)

by orphan_account



Category: Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy - Douglas Adams
Genre: F/M, Fluff
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-03-02
Updated: 2014-03-02
Packaged: 2018-01-14 08:08:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,337
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1259119
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Exactly what it says on the tin</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Proposal One: A New Name

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tricia recieves the nickname Trillian from a drunken slurring Zaphod, who suggests a new last name for her as well

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote and posted this chapter on my 3DS. The internet browser isn't that bad.

"Zaphod, are you drunk?"

One of Zaphod's heads looked up at the questioner. It was not the first time he had been asked this, nor the last, but the voice sounded very familiar.

"Trish, baby, of course I'm not drunk. I'm _drinking_!" he slurred, quite clearly confirming her suspicion. 

Tricia sighed. She had known this man (as much as he could be called a man) for a month now, and by a conservative estamate he had spent half of it falling-down drunk. It was equal parts annoying and troubling, made more so by her tenuous grasp of his physiology."Please don't call me Trish, I already told you that." she settled on saying. In her relatively short time with Zaphod, she had already gotten an idea of the type of drunk he was; in the state he was in, he was still likely to remember this all later.

"Well whaddaya want me to say then baby? You got yourself a hard-to-say name there. Tricia...McMillan was it? Yeah, the first part's not so bad but the second? Tricia Mcmillan. Trilla McTrician. McTricia Millan...Trician...McTri...Trillian McTricia...Trillia...Trillian...Trill...hey, I like the sound of that one. 'Trillian'" He spread two of his arms out for effect, looking at his companion hopefully with both sets of eyes. 

"Yeah, whaddaya say about that babe, you like Trillian? So much easier to say, yeah? Of course it is!" He didn't wait for a response to reward his genius with another swig from the bottle of liquor he was holding in his third arm. 

Tricia considered this with more thought than the drunken ramble probably warrented. Trillian did have a certain...ring to it. Very spacey, which seemed almost hilariously appropriate. Honestly one of the best nicknames she had heard.

"You know what Zaphod. That might be the first good idea you've had since taking me with you from that party." the newly christianed Trillian concluded, grabbing the bottle out of Zaphod's hand. He frowned at this, but didn't say anything for fear of drowning out the compliment.

"Plenty more good ideas where that one came from babe, especially where you're concerned." One head added in a wink for effect, the other a far less subtle eyebrow waggle. Trillian rolled her eyes but laughed nonetheless. She still had moments of doubt about her impulsive and largely alcohol-influenced decision to leave not only a party but her entire planet with a man who was largely a stranger, but often moments like this would come about and she felt strangely at ease. 

Her new name suited her new life, she felt; it seemed almost childish how fantastical it was, but everything in her life lately-especially her traveling companion- was childishly fantastical. Even she felt she was catching it, becoming more childish and fantastic the longer she spent away from England.

Not irresponsible, someone had to balance Zaphod out, but more free and alive than she ever remembers feeling. 

Putting the bottle out of reach, she sat down next to Zaphod, who put one arm around her shoulders and another around her waist. 

"I expect you 'll need a last name too; and I've got the wildest idea for one. Now, just hear me out on this: Trillian Beeblebrox." Zaphod grinned widely with both heads, looking at Trillian expectantly.

Trillian gave Zaphod a questioning look. "Are you saying we should get married?" she asked, surprised. She was unable to tell if he was joking or not. 

"Yeah, why not? Plenty of planets you can do it real fast on, I can check The Guide and find one nearby." 

Trillian shook her head and chuckled at Zaphod's drunken impulsiveness. "How about this; ask me again when A.) we've known each other longer than a month and B.) you're actually sober."

Zaphod frowned, genuinely for a split second, then theatrically. "Trillian, you wound me.", he moaned, before he and Trillian burst out laughing, the proposal forgotten almost entirely.


	2. Proposal Two: Surprise

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The press breaks the story that Trillian has surpassed the longest of any of Zaphod's relationships; 6 weeks later, Zaphod tells when she actually has.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another 3DS chapter. Then again, I usually write these on my phone.

Zaphod Beeblebrox is well-known for going through romantic partners very quickly. Therefore, the only surprising part of Trillian's sudden appearance was her planet of origin.

"Ugh, Earth. Little backwater dirtball. Only has a one-word guide entry, so I got curious, but let me tell you one word is overselling it. But then I saw this woman, bored out of her mind, and I thought to myself, 'Zaphod, that woman is far too good for this planet, and it is your duty to reascue her.' And, well, I did. Fell right for me; my good looks I expect, but the ship didn't hurt." He grinned as the press laughed just as he expected them to. "But yeah, I think she might be the one, you know. She's pretty great."

Zaphod had in fact met a new 'the one' every few weeks; no one but Trillian were surprised by the statement. She blushed, but said nothing.

About 6 weeks later, the press were in fact surprised, because Trillian had, according to them, surpassed the longest relationship Zaphod had ever been in. He made no comment on this to Trillian, which didn't surprise her one bit.

6 weeks after that, Trillian was, in fact, surprised.

"Hey Trillian," Zaphod said excitedly, shaking her awake. "You'll never guess what today is!"

Trillian groaned and opened her eyes, wanting to sleep just a bit more. "What is it Zaphod?" she asked sleepily.

"The Anniversary!"

"Zaphod, I've been with you for 12 weeks, what could this possibly be the anniversary of?"

"Exactly!" he exclaimed. "The longest I've ever been with someone was 11 weeks and 6 days, on an Earth calendar at least. You won, and the grand prize is me!"

Trillian's sleep-fuzzy mind tried to process this. "But I thought it was only 6 weeks?"

"Yeah, that's what the press thinks, but there was this one time back when I was still in school. Anyways, we need to celebrate this!"

Trillian blinked confusedly for a moment. "Wow. I suppose when you put it that way..." This seemed to be a rare moment where Zaphod was actually thoughtful. 

"Exactly! And I have the _best_ idea for what we should do. I actually tried to make you breakfast, but I guess I'm better at mixing drinks than making food, but whatever, only like 3 things are still on fire and that'll sort itself out." Trillian gave him a worried look, but he didn't notice and continued to speak excitedly. "Anyways, tonight I want you to get all dolled up, and we can go out somewhere real romantic-like, yeah?" Trillian smiled at this, the fire comment still on her mind.

"And tomorow I want you to come with me to this wicked little jewlery store I know, cause I don't know your ring size or what sorta metal you like, and-" Trillian cut him off.

"Wait, hold on, why are we going to a jewlery store?"

"To get wedding rings of course. We've been together this long, I figure what's the rest of our lives? I'm even mostly sober right now, like you said!"

Trillian willfully ignored the 'mostly'. "Shouldnt you ask me first?"

"Right, dammit, I knew I forgot something. So, whaddaya say? First Lady of the galaxy would suit you pretty well."

"Zaphod, what-no, we can't get married!"

Zaphod had a rare genuine expression of hurt and confusion on his faces. "Why not?"

Trillian took a calming breath. "Look, I get that this is a big deal for you, and I'm flattered, really, but honey, 12 weeks just isn't that long a time for me. I'm not saying no, I'm just saying not right now, ok?"

"Right, ok, no I totally get it." Zaphod answered, trying to look nonchalant and not in the slightest disappointed.

"Now, what was that about fire?"

"Oh, don't worry about that. Or, you know, you could if you want. Maybe think about putting it out. That sounds good too. Whichever you want."

Trillian rolled her eyes and then rolled out of bed to investigate Zaphod's latest well-meant disaster.


End file.
